Right now the big thing is that the language just seems CRAZY to me. Whoever said Spanish was the easiest language to learn was crazy. Those words are obviously spoken by people who haven't had to learn the language to survive. It is much different when you learn something for fun or for a school credit than when you need it to LIVE. So many words and forms and just so much of everything! I feel so old everyday, I just can't seem to make the info stick in my brain. Over the years I have had many people comment to me about how they could never learn to sew or how the sewing I was trying to show them just didn't make sense. When I am sewing if something doesn't make sense then I usually just change it, or do it another way that DOES make sense in my little pea brain. You can't just change a language to make it easier for you to command or understand. Really it isn't even so much that I don't understand, I just think that sometimes it is weird. Again, English is not perfect-it is just what I have known for 31 years.
I know that the day will come when I will go to the playground and I will be able to engage another mother in conversation about her child (b/c generally they only have 1!) or about her dog. I know that one day I will walk into a store and not be absolutely terrified that someone will speak to me and I will have to admit " no entiendo" or "repite, por favor". I know that I would not have been asked to come here if it were outside of my ability to do it. I know that the Lord IS going to open my brain and give me the ability to do it. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be this hard. Maybe, for me, I need the challenge to fully rely on God and not on myself and to really give Him the opportunity to show himself to me daily. On my first day of language class I was so excited- I got up early to do my QT first thing and I have been reading through Genesis so I opened up to where I was supposed to read next and what do you think it was? That's right "the tower of Babel"! Yeah, for real. That day I thought it was funny, but today as I look back on that I am thinking that the Lord was just reminding me that He did this whole language thing and that HE knows it is going to be hard for me, but that HE has got this! He can and will do this. I will not only learn but master this language with His help and encouragement. Our purpose here depends on it.